“While you are reaching for the stars, you might just happen upon the moon”.
Honestly if I think about it, there’s probably not a lot of thought that’s actually gone into some of the decisions I’ve made over the years. Some have been great, others not so, but I now realised that everything I have done until now has led me to here.
I’ve always believed in the law of attraction to some extent. Not so much that the universe will provide, more along the lines of when you back yourself, put in the effort, work smart and step outside your comfort-zone the universe, more often than not, will have your back.
My ‘Living the ‘–‘ blog, isn’t just about exploring new places, meeting new people and posting pretty pictures on social media. Sure, I love to travel, and it is a huge part of my life, but my blog is also about the other parts of my life, the good, the bad and the observations I’ve made along the way.
Our new unit was finally finished, and we were set to move in two weeks before I headed off to Spain. It could have been the packing, cleaning, really disappointing quality of the finished unit, the fact that the lift broke down the day we moved, and half our furniture was left to the elements in the parking area downstairs.
Who knows, it could have been subconscious nerves about heading into the unknown, perhaps a combination of everything but I started getting chest pains and shortness of breath. In fact, I was heading to the shops and it came on so badly I truly thought I was having a heart attack.
I was panicked enough to walk into the nearest Doctors surgery – about 10 metres away. By the time the ambulance arrived I had calmed down and was feeling better but as with any suspected heart-attack you’re sent to hospital as a precaution. They run tests and more tests, take your blood and put you on a cardiogram. The longer it went on the sillier I felt, like a fraud, taking up time and resources from people with a greater need. With hindsight, I realise that I’d probably just experienced my first ever full-on panic attack!
Anyway, travelling to the other side of the world on your own can be a challenge. It certainly hadn’t bothered me doing it in my 20’s but when you’re a lot older and pretty set in your ways, a new life in a different culture certainly chucks you out of your comfort zone.
I’m pretty okay with spending time in my own company but not for long periods and a few months in without making any real connections it was hard. If I’m honest there were times I really started to understand what it feels like to be lonely.
It certainly makes you appreciate home and the friends and family you sometimes take for granted. But life is there for us to live and grow and challenge ourselves. Albert had a few pearls of wisdom to guide me along when I was feeling unsure of what next, and he’s not often steered me wrong with any of his advice. As he said, I could always go home if it was too bad, and he was right, it’s always an option, but I’d made a commitment and was determined to see it through.
As Dr Brené Brown would say, I had to draw deep on my courage, and when I did, life improved, things got better. They always do when you change your thinking.